Pondering

Lots of pondering happening today. It is quiet, which finally provides the space wherein I will allow myself to go internal, feel, think & reflect. My love is on a peaceful sabbatical for a few days and it is NOT our weekend with the kiddos. We are both "filling our tanks" in ways that we need - which is to spend a little time alone, time with God, time with our inner selves, time to write, create, sleep, etc...whatever it is that we have need of this day - in each moment, we have the freedom to JUST......and to ONLY.....take care of our own needs. Many couples do not do this for themselves, or for one another....this is our first time and I think something that we've both realized is good for us both and we need to be intentional about building it in as needed. The last few weeks have been HELL to say the least and my love has been carrying about 99.9% of the load. Not only was she dealing with issues within her own family (her sister and some health issues/scares) but then I had an outpatient surgery that was supposed to be 10 minutes, easy-peasy, home and back to work the next day - and then as soon as I got home began having major complications - ended up back at the ER, admitted, had to have another more serious surgery to deal with the complications and was in the hospital for 4 days....then home to recover - AND it's our 5 custodial days with our twin kiddos. Ok - need I say more. She has been taking care of me, of them, of our family and our home, or her family, her sister, ......and the list goes on......and so now, this weekend - her only task is to TAKE CARE OF HER - in whatever way that manifests itself.....she has promised to take care of herself. So, in my time alone (which btw, just started at 8:00pm last night) I have had some very amazing interactions with some people I didn't expect where I believe they were absolutely meant to happen. I'm not ready to blog about it all yet....but I still am SOOOOOO amazed at times that when we feel a desire to "take a walk" and then on that walk we run into someone, strike up a conversation and that conversation turns into a life changing moment for that person.........those types of moments......I had a few of them last night.............and I'm still amazed! So, there's lots of pondering going on for me today. I am going to catch up on my blogs (gosh I miss all of you...and what the heck is going on over there with KJ and the kids, I don't even KNOW what child has wrecked what kind of havoc within what part of the house for gosh sakes!! and that is JUST WRONG) I am going to do some writing. I am going to do some reading. I would bet you I'll do some napping....during the 2 listed above, and prob. not intentional. lol I am going to watch some tv and veggg out. I am going to "Just Be" - and enjoy the silence, knowing my family is all taken care of.....and maybe if I feel up to it, call my dad and ask him out on a date later tonight. ;-) Hey, there's a $3.00 movie theatre up the street...so watch out!! So - back to ponder away - just wanted to "touch base" with all of you in some way. May you all have a great day and may you find space to just be today. (breathe in....and now out....aaawwwwww)