a day without plans

where everything is free

to naturally be

and as beauty and love reveal itself

the most amazing day unfolds

the shower, the love, the bed, inside you, inside me

the books, the worship, you worked as I read

the fun, the laughter, the love permeating the room

the pharmacy, the bank, the babies...oh the babies

a day without plans

boy, we should not make plans more often!

your beauty, in raw honesty, is inspiring
your smile, from across the room, melts my heart
your eyes, full of intense color, look over me and I feel known
in the core of my being
i know i am not alone
let my love guide you
it's time to come home
no more damage
being slung your direction
no more wounding
no more self rejection
it's time to rise out of the ashes
& take off the grave clothes
for your beauty, in raw honesty, is inspiring

the longing in her heart is piercing
it reminds her that she is 'not yet'
becoming is a process that requires waiting
she's being carved and chipped away
the constant grasping for air is tiring
if only the sun could shine upon her it's warmth
but each day brings a new beginning
and her desire is greater than her fear
peace is present, if only for moments
and love is slowly penetrating her soul
grace abounds in great measure
as she embraces her true self
as she embraces me
as she embraces free
becoming is a process that requires waiting
but joy cometh in the morning

Mommy, C and Little T on their 4th birthday!!! You are amazing, wonderful little people and I am so blessed that God gave you to me!! I love you both immensely and I promise to show you that love truly can conquer all...true, authentic, God inspired love.

Thank you for letting me be your mommy!

Beauty
Through you, I am in awe
You give unconditionally without requiring anything in return
Rawness
Through weakness and vulnerability
You allow the magnificent to rise up from the struggle
Spirit
Through surrender and humility
You allow the essence of God to be revealed
Heart
Through settling into your truth
You expose others to a higher standard
Joy
Through laughter and play
You remain grounded in the moment
Kindness
Through empathy and compassion
You SEE others and care deeply about their condition
Love
In you
All around you
Flowing through you

You are anything BUT the average girl!

you surprised me
i didn't expect you
i'm taken off guard
feeling a bit off kilter
but it feels amazing

you fascinate me
i'm captivated and intrigued
i'm sure it's a journey;
discovering you...
but one i hope to take

Well, it's been a long time since I have posted on my blog. I haven't been ready. I was not sure I would ever be ready. However, I am now ready to reclaim this blog as MINE. I started this blog to write, to process, to discover, to memorialize, to journal, to network, to connect and to create. I have taken a few months off due to major life changes. Transformation and change is a part of my every day existence. I am walking a journey that is painful & difficult, but promises to purify and renew.

I am single.
I am a single mom.
I am sharing custody of my children.
I have moved.
I have my own home; for me and my children.
I have amazing friends and family that have supported me and continue to do so.
I am loved by God and He is taking care of me.
I am going to be ok.
I am changing.
I am healing.
I am recovering.

I will reclaim this blog as my space - I must. I have made some changes to it, in order to make it feel like my space. I am a writer and I will continue to write.